Drama on Court · Lesson 1

The Intensity Check

Your competitiveness is an asset. Nobody’s coaching it out of you. Just make sure you’re the one driving it.

Run the check

Run it on a real match

Think of the match that’s got you wound up. Tap your answers. Your card fills in as you go.

Example

“You used to beat her. Now she’s beating you.”

Three questions, then you decide.

Question 1 of 3

What am I chasing right now?

My Intensity Check

Example

Chasing

Making it mean

Costing me

My call

When you notice proving

“This is a match. Not a verdict.”

Keep the fire. Hold the reins.

Screenshot it. Look at it in the parking lot. 🎾

The steps

Three questions, then you decide

There’s nothing automatically wrong with anything you’re chasing. You can want sectionals. You can want playoffs. We just want you choosing it on purpose.

  1. What am I chasing right now?

    A win? Line one? A lineup spot? Your captain’s approval? Proof you’re improving? Name it.

  2. What am I making it mean?

    If I don’t make the lineup, what am I making that mean about me? Is a loss simply “Damn, I really wanted that one,” or is it “Maybe I’m not as good as I thought”?

    That second one is where competing slides into proving.

  3. What is it costing me?

    Maybe time and money you’re delighted to spend. Fantastic. Conscious choice.

    But if it’s costing you your joy, your peace, or a friendship, that’s when we check ourselves.

  4. Decide.

    “Yep. I want this, and I’ll pay the price.” Or “It’s costing too much. Time to hold the reins.”

    The fire is fantastic. We just don’t want it burning down everything around it.

Scripts

What to say to yourself

Before the match

“I want this. And I’ll be okay either way.”

When you notice proving

“This is a match. Not a verdict.”

After a loss

“Damn, I really wanted that one.”

Full stop. That’s the whole sentence.

Your reset and mantra

Keep the fire. Hold the reins.

Your intensity is an asset. Your desire to win is an asset. Just make sure you’re the one driving it.

Take it home

On the drive home

Answer these in your head, or text them to yourself.

  1. Where am I competing, and where am I proving?

  2. One thing I’ll do this week to stay in the driver’s seat.